8 Ways to Make Herding the Cats to Church Easier

In the dictionary worship comes right after worn, worn-out, worry, worrywart, worse and worsen. Sometimes on Sunday mornings worship follows the same sequence. Getting children and young people to the worship place is too often as far as we get in helping our offspring to worship. As the dropout rate of older kids indicates, there has got to be a better way! … Recently I listened to a group of parents share their frustrations with Sunday mornings. These were parents whose lives are given to Christian ministry–parents steeped in Scripture, parents committed to rearing their children in ways that honor the Lord. Even though I understood, my heart just broke as Sunday morning was described as “the worst morning of my week.” One mother confessed, “Sometimes I’m relieved to stay home if one of the kids is sick.” Another shared, “I’m just exhausted by the time I get to church.”           –Robbie Castleman, Parenting in the Pew

Getting the tribe to church can be an exercise in herding cats, but with the added task of getting the cats dressed and fed! Still, this herding is important since the last thing you want your kids to think is that the light yoke of following Jesus is really heavy on Sunday morning. If anything should be joyous, it’s  worshipping the Maker of heaven and earth. Joyous, however, doens’t mean easy. Here are 8 ways to make church, and getting there, better.

  1. Set Sunday apart. We have a 5 day workweek, 2 day weekend mindset, but God gave the creation pattern for the benefit of man, six days of work and one day of worship and rest. Saturday and Sunday are not twins. There is nothing wrong with working vocationally for five days and doing other things on Saturday. But there is something unhealthy with treating the entire weekend as the same, and doing so much on Saturday that you are completely spent by the time Sunday, and particularly worship, comes around. Jesus rose on Sunday, and though Christians didn’t have the day off to rest at the time, they still met for worship on the first day of the week until the gospel influenced the culture enough to make Sunday a day of rest. Religious types like to make Sunday into a day full of religious work, but God gave it for corporate worship and rest. Jesus said the Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath. If this was true in the old covenant, how much more in the new? If the day of resurrection isn’t relieving, refreshing and rejoicing, where are we? But receiving this gift requires recognizing it. All of these patterns are get to, not have to, and this whole concept is hard for grumpy Sabbatarians who like to argue about the day of peace. Seen as a gift, Sundays are more like a holiday than a tax day. This is without doubt the most important point. From it flow all sorts of practical things, but without it they are just dumb tips for easier living. Meeting with the living God and his people in the way he called us to–Word and sacrament with the whole family–is the entire thing.
  2. Begin thinking about Sunday on Saturday. The Jews kept the Sabbath from sundown to sundown, beginning Friday night and concluding on Saturday night. Scripture doesn’t require this, but it can be a great help. I try to put away my work–vocational, chores, bills etc–by Saturday night. And my wife does the same. Food still has to be made, kids cleaned up etc., but minimizing the work is an enormous help. Getting ready for Saturday night and Sunday means husbands will need to pitch in extra, and this is exactly what the fourth commandment requires–those in authority need to be sure those under their authority get a day off (Dt. 4:14).
  3. Food & Fellowship. The early Christians eat together constantly in the book of Acts (Acts 2:42, 46; 20:7). It’s hard to be grumpy when you are full of food and surrounded by good friends. The Lord’s Day is a day of feasting and fellowship. This centers on communion where we eat and drink with Christ and his body, but it spills out from there. We typically do something especially fun on Saturday night: food, friends, wine, games. Something special, and when the budget is drained, special means cheap but still interesting food.
  4. Sleep. Like other things in this post, this is obvious. Captain Obvious at your service. Though for some apparently this isn’t so obvious, and it probably goes back to number one above. If Sunday is set apart, it’s worth getting good sleep for. I’m well aware as the chief of hypocrites this is not always possible, but trying for it is possible. It’s one thing to do something edifying that takes you later into Saturday night, and another  thing to watch a dumb movie until one o’clock in the morning. If your kids are going to be sane for church, they need to sleep.
  5. Minimize the Morning Rush. What things are hard to do in the morning before church that can be done earlier? Laying out clothes, putting things together to go in the car, knowing what’s for breakfast and making it easy, these make the morning a known and smooth process. My wife is phenomenal at this and always gives the kids a nice morning even if I’m distracted by work.
  6. Talk about Worship. If you are looking forward to praying, singing, hearing the sermon, uniting with God’s people, and meeting new people, then you talk about it. Not all of these things are easy for anyone and they have to be taught to your kids. You anticipate going in, recap heading out, and not just in the car on the way there and back. If worship is central to life, then the specific content of the service is also. We can’t say worship is important and then never talk about it. This doesn’t require massive discussions all the time. When kids hear mom humming the tune sung last week in worship, and dad asks them occasionally what they thought of this point the pastor made, they are seeing their parents engaged, informed and influenced by the Lord’s service. If you anticipate, enjoy and reflect on it, so will they.
  7. Teach Kids to Worship, Not Sit Still. Part of worship is sitting still, but that’s not really the goal. The goal is to pray, sing, hear, learn and love. Some parents say no books or pencils since it’s too distracting. I find it depends on what the kids are dong with them. Certainly these are potential distractions, but making a kid sit still with nothing in his hands doesn’t guarantee he is paying attention. If he using the pencil to draw a picture related to the sermon, that is far better than counting the beams on the ceiling. One size doesn’t fit all, but I don’t mind my kids listening and interacting with multimedia. Of course there are other people to consider. But if they see your kids paying attention with a crayon in hand, they should be encouraged.
  8. Embrace the Chaos. Sometimes the only thing getting you to church on time, or at all is, coffee. This might well be why it exists. Parents have to be flexible, relaxed and gracious. Of course the diaper blows out on the way out the door. And the kids get into a spat on the way right into church. And you didn’t sleep well last night. No amount of good theology or practical planning will eliminate these things. But good theology will allow you to laugh, keep things in perspective, and know the wonderful work God is doing. And the planning will make it easier to enjoy.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *